Family Ties
by Beckintime
Summary: A/N This is for the 6th Round of the houses competition Category: Drabble Prompt: Torn Out pages House: Ravenclaw Word Count: 896


**A/N This is for the 6th Round of the houses competition**

 **Category: Drabble**

 **Prompt: Torn Out pages**

 **House: Ravenclaw**

 **Word Count: 896**

James woke up to the sun from the window warming his face uncomfortably. He looked at the mounted clock in the dormroom. He was already half an hour late for potions class. He shrugged, thinking there was no point to him going down there now.

Pondering on the food he'd scavenge from the kitchens He noticed something tucked under the pillow of the bed left of the door, the one belonging to Sirius. He grabbed the item, which turned out to be a small leather bound journal.

Unwrapping the binding hastily, he began to read the messy handwriting of his best friend:

 _If you aren't me, put this book down. Or I'll kill you._ James laughed at the cliché note.

The next hour, he spent learning the secrets of the other boy, his crushes, how he cheated of James' homework- to which the other boy jumped off the bed and shouted, "I knew it"- but also other things that weren't so jovial. The situation at home, how his favourite cousin, Andromeda just got disowned for marrying a "mudblood". Sirius worried for her, and also for himself, who rebelled against his family and their views any chance he could. James could practically feel the anxiety leaching out of each cursive letter.

He noticed the inside of the journal was a mess- words scribbled out with so much pressure that tiny fissures had formed on each page, others were torn out completely.

James lied down on the floor and lifted the bed sheets up. As he suspected, torn out pages littered the floor.

Pulling them out, he scanned through them.

Drawings of himself in immense pain, being tortured by some unseen force. His friend always had a talent for being able to draw things in gruesome detail. This was worrying. However, it was the written words that made James tense in anger the most.

 _If someone is reading this, it means I am dead. Whether it was by the hands of my family or by my own is at this point a mystery even to me._

 _I don't know why I'm even writing this, it's not like anyone would find it if my body was found; although, knowing my family, it probably wouldn't be found at all. Just another secret to them. Hell, they'd see it as a good thing if I was gone. You see, they never cared, nor did they love, they just hated. I'm pretty sure they all hate each other. I know they hate me for sure. The words are harsher than the beatings though. Telling me I'm a failiure to the family, how I should be like my younger brother Regulus. He isn't my brother though. Not really. I really have three brothers, James, Remus and Peter._

 _If it is you guys that are reading this, I am sorry. I am sorry I couldn't hold out against their torturous acts and malevolent demeanours; I am sorry I couldn't tell you much of what really went on. We all had more important things - like you, Moony - to think about than my problems. I am sorry._ _I love you all_ _Hogwarts was an escape for me and thank you for making it such._

 _Hopefully, wherever we go after, will be better than home._

 _Your Friend,_

 _Padfoot._

A small drawing of a paw was imprinted onto the side of the torn and scrunched up page. The ink was slightly smeared from obvious tear stains. James didn't realise his own were trailing down his face as he shook from tension reading over the lines again and again.

He knew it was bad, but not this bad, if only Sirius had said. He could have done something, anything, lived with James or one of the other Marauders.

James heard the common room door open and the voices of his friends enter downstairs. He quickly piled the torn out pages and shoved them under the bed, rebound the book and hid it back under the pillow where he found it and lied back on his bed, looking as relaxed as possible.

His eyes met the long-haired boy striding up the staircases. "Oi, Potter, get your butt moving! You have Quidditch practice soon, and I swear if we lose next match due to you oversleeping practice again, I'm going to kill you," Sirius said, grinning over at James.

"Yeah...Yeah…" James said distracted, still thinking about the pages under the bed.

"What's wrong, Prongs?" Sirius asked now concerned, coming over to sit with his friend. "Wanna talk about it?"

"Nothing...just... I realised I haven't been there for you guys much recently with the whole Lily drama thing, if there was anything up you'd tell me right?"

The smile on Sirius' face was so genuine that James would have believed it if he didn't know it was fake. "Of course."

"You sure?"

When the other boy didn't respond, James got up and hugged Sirius

"Whoa- what was that for?" The other boy asked, concern now reaching his eyes.

"I was just thinking...do you want to come stay at mine this summer?"

You read …" Sirius silenced himself in mid-sentence. "Never mind." His whole posture was tense.

But then, he shrugged and his smile returned almost as bright as the gleam in his eye. And Sirius, for potentially the first time in his life, said, "Can summer be here already?"


End file.
